It’s Gotta Go Somewhere

There are few municipalities that can deal well with three-inch-per-hour rainfall events, especially within 72 hours of each other. As a result, the usual places were full of water after the second event, and the catchment basins overfilled. The dry lake near Day Job is not dry, as at least one person discovered (the tracks in the mud got deeper, and deeper, before the guy decided that reverse was the better part of valor and left mud all over the road.) The outside lanes of several streets were to be eschewed by anyone with good sense or a low vehicle.

The problem is that water has to go somewhere. Downhill, or into the soil, or yes, sometimes faster, sometimes slower. Rain falling on dry sand vanishes in a heartbeat. Rain on waterlogged clay will be around for a while. Water on roofs and pavement … will find a way to go down, or turns into an unplanned urban lake.

Once it leaves the sky, water does one of three things – soak in (infiltrate), run off, or sit until it overflows or evaporates. Soil (all but 100% clay) absorbs rain and snow-melt at varying rates based on how wet, loose, and/or sandy it is. The plant cover also influences absorption and run-off, grasses vs. trees vs. both, crops of varying kinds, plowed soil or soil with crops … People have come up with rules-of-thumb for all those variables. Ground that is already full of water can’t hold more, so the water runs off, or ponds, waiting to evaporate or eventually soak in.

Runoff happens slower or faster. Bare ground, rock, roofs and parking lots, they have fast runoff. Nothing can soak in, so it all goes away as fast as it can. Flat, well-grassed ground that is moderately saturated will have a slower runoff rate. If the runoff takes dirt with it, you get erosion of various kinds, from mild to “where the heck’s my house?!?” to “wasn’t there a road and valley here last week?” Runoff lubricates loose rock, especially loose sediment on a moderate to steep slope. That’s not really a problem for most of the High Plains, although there are places where sinkholes and rockfalls are indeed a problem.

However, flat land that’s 20-90% hardscape, with waterlogged other land, and fast hard rain means the water sits and rises, or flows a little and rises. welcome to “urban and small stream flood advisories” and water where people would prefer it not loiter, or even be. 1941 was one of the years that will live in memory, because people needed boats to get around some of the towns in the area. It is not fun, especially not for the people who wake up to discover that the lake “over there” is now over here, or their road is too deep to depart, at least for a few hours. However, that’s what happens when the water needs to go, and the only place to go is “spread out over everything.”

Solutions? Leave rainwater lakes alone, or deepen them into catchment basins, encourage less hardscaping and more green areas, permeable paving where that is an option (and does not contribute to groundwater pollution.) And patience. The rain and water will pass. Eventually.

Alma’s Dream House

A Blast from the Past, because I got busy writing and not blogging. 66K words into the next Familiar Generations book. 

If I were to win the Powerball, and the laws of physics and engineering were abrogated, I could build the perfect-for-Alma house. It would have lots of windows, plenty of space for books, an enormous kitchen, and be small enough to clean easily. And be at least partly underground and tornado proof. As I said, if the laws of engineering were abrogated . . . Continue reading →

Overheard in the Halls: High Water Edition

Frisky Freshman: That’s a lot of water.

Flopped Freshman [from the depths of the beanbag chair]: Rain happens.

Frisky: Stuff’s floating in it.

A small stampede to the window ensues. Exclamations of awe, surprise, and mild concern come from the crowd until I clear my throat and they return to studying.

Me: No, you may not swim in St. Angus River. We all know what fish do in water. [returns to grading]

******

Scattered Senior: Miss Red, have you seen the political ads for [candidate]?

Me: Yes. Have you spotted the problems in them? [looks at rest of class]

Studious: [Perks up from post-quiz slouch] Problems?

Me: [calls up one of the ads in question and puts on screen/whiteboard] OK, who is this trying to appeal to, and how?

The government students spent the rest of the class picking apart three different candidates’ ads and not grumbling about why Congress is so complicated.

******

Fr. Martial [the headmaster]: We have a problem.

Facultative types look at each other, trying to sort out what we are about to need to do.

Fr. Martial: Ahem. [holds up tablet computer with photo on it]

Faculty, after collective wince: Yes, Father. How many?

Fr. Martial: Half of the juniors. They are not to come into the building until they have de-mudded themselves.

Nods, ranging from enthusiastic to firm to weary, greet his words.

This year’s juniors – some of them – thought they could succeed where last year’s seniors failed. Mud, like honey badger, don’t care, and three pickups and a motorcycle were now bogged in the field. They would have been far less tardy returning from lunch if they’d just used the road, but no, they had to try the not-really-a-road through two fields and a pasture.

******

Flopped Freshman: So, they thought they could buy their way out of trouble?

Strange Sophomore: [glances at student’s notes] Yes. It worked for local political people, so why not G-d? It doesn’t work like that, especially not today.

Serious Senior: Luther again?

Flopped: Luther. Again.

Apparently the Protestant and World religion classes are doing a little church history.

A Not So Mild Dental Observation

When one has veneers (or crowns as they used to be called), it becomes rapidly apparent when a piece of jalapeño or other hot pepper gets trapped between the shoulder at the base of said crown and one’s gum. The strength of the observation is directly proportional to the Scoville rating of said pepper piece, and the time duration between the observation and the ability to extricate said piece of pepper.

This is all. Ow.

Tuesday Tidbit: St. Michael at Sea

The sea-borne Hunters honor the feast. The PoV is Danil’s.

As the cloud of stars stretched across the dark sky, all not on watch gathered on the bow. Willem accepted the silk-wrapped bundle from Blackie, who bowed and rejoined the others. The water sorcerer unfolded the scarlet, sable, and silver brocade, revealing the book. He lifted it, and all bowed.

The most precious thing aboard ship, a Hunter called Miguel-Carlos had rescued it from a fiery massacre of the rest of his kin. He’d fled to the sea, hoping to find passage to the old lands. He had died of his injuries aboard the Tsovinar, or Niccola as she’d been called then. The book’s pages retained a faint hint of smoke scent, even after a century and quarter.

Willem bowed, then opened the book and turned to the Vigil of the Defender. “Behold the works of the Great God, who made all things and called them good,” he chanted, his words rolling over the dark deeps around them.

“Glory to the Great God and praise for His goodness,” the men chanted in turn.

“Blessed be the Spirit that brooded upon the waters of Creation.”

“Glory to the Spirit and thanks for the waters.”

“Blessed be the Son who turned water into wine, and whose blood washed clean the world.”

“Glory to the Son and thanks for wine and blood.”

“Blessed be the Lady of Night, Mother of the Son, who watches over Her Hunters.”

“All honor to the Lady and Her Defender.”

Willem took a deep breath and sang, “The angels of Heaven fought the Dragon, the evil one, behind the sword of Michael Archangel, the defender of Paradise and of souls. By the power of the Great God alone is evil defeated and darkness banished.”

“Thanks be to the Great God.”

“Holy is the Great God, omniscient and omnipotent. St. Michael Defender, first and greatest Hunter, protector of the Lady, be for us a guide and shield, intercede for us in our time of need.”

“Thanks be to God.”

Willem bowed once more, closed and swaddled the book as the other knelt. Some found places toward the stern for more private devotions and meditations. Capt. Posidonius departed for the bridge to keep his own vigil at the helm. Blackie returned the book to its place of safety. Danil considered, then drew his Rosary from his pocket and sat on the deck, on the starboard side. Metal decking and his knees no longer agreed.

“They who go down to the sea in ships, who do business by the great waters, they see the works of the Lord and his wonders in the deep*,” he murmured, touching the medallion of Our Lady Star of the Sea. After the Psalm, he began the Rosary, adding a St. Michael invocation with each “Our Father,” and meditating on the Dark Mystery.

He let his eyes unfocus, gaze turned to the stars strewn overhead. How long had Hunters sailed the waters? Since the Age of Sail, or so the captain thought. The ship books only went back to the the decade of the War of Crowns, a hundred twenty years or so. Only the book of worship had survived the wreck of the Hunters’ first ship. The Lady and Her Defender had saved lives, not things.

“St. Michael, Archangel, defend us in battle; be thou our protection against the wickedness and snares of the Devil,” he recited. He stood, stretched, and contemplated the dark waters and brilliant stars. “When I behold the heavens, even the works of Thy fingers, the moon and the stars which Thou hath ordained, What is man that Thou art mindful of him?”** And yet the Great God had sent His Son, and angels, to save and protect the sons of Adam. Awe and wonder indeed were His.

Danil leaned on the rail, watching the stars. Did the Hunters on land do the same? Or did they remain in the chapels, as they had in his youth. For a moment he fancies he could smell the incense, cool yet tinged with Mystery, hear the rising and falling voices of the other Hunters and women. The scent of sea and ship replaced memory, and he returned to his prayers.

*Psalm 107/106 Vulgate

**Psalm 8, Geneva

(C) 2026 Alma T. C. Boykin All Rights Reserved

Daffynitions and Sniglets™

Fuelish optimism: n. Not adding a stop along the way because you’ve got plenty of gas and the forecast is for light winds and tailwinds.

Stable airmass: the atmosphere over Omaha, Kansas City, Chicago, and other places with large feedlots and cattle shipping areas.

Daja-Moo: the sense that you’ve heard this B.S. before. Ex. “And we guarantee that your rates will not go up as long as you use our service!”

Mow-zone Layer – that part of the yard where the grass grows the fastest. Often the hardest to reach with a lawn mower or weed-trimmer, but most easily visible to neighbors and passers-by.

Glowsted: v. When the light fails to work, quitting without warning after the stores close and the last spare bulb of that size has been used.

*Sniglet™ was the term from the HBO program “Not Necessarily the News” for words that didn’t exist but should.

Cart or Wagon?

What are you moving, how far are you moving it, and how much wood (and later iron) do you have? Oh, and what do you have to pull said cart or wagon? Answer those and you know which you need.

To mangle a phrase, the cart seems to have come before the horse. Carts, small two-wheeled vehicles, probably developed from travois sorts of things. We don’t know, because we don’t have drawings, and wood and leather don’t survive well compared to other things. Carts first appear in the late Neolithic and Chalcolithic/Bronze Age, drawn by asses and occasionally by cattle. Horses were domesticated to pull before they were ridden, if the archaeological and linguistic records are correct. Solid wheels (saw log, bore or chisel hole in middle, add stick, roll) came first, then plank wheels. Some places used plank wheels well into the late 1800s or early 1900s, because they worked.

Carts are great for small loads, or large loads that are not going far. They are less expensive than wagons, use fewer animals, and can be maneuvered into small places relatively easily (think most medieval to early modern streets and house gates.) In England, prior to the enclosure acts and the industrial development of the 1770s-1850s, carts predominated. Wagons were used only for luggage or moving people. Farm goods rarely traveled far, or in bulk, overland, so carts filled every need. When grain farming became more common, and the need to feed larger cities developed, the English seem to have copied farm wagons from the Low Countries as their model.

Wagons appear in Europe in the Bronze Age, as ceremonial items, and a few archaeological finds (the Vix burial is one example). They lacked high sides, or so it seems from the models and sacrificial finds. However, those might have been ceremonial vehicles only, with higher-sided farm wagons being used until they fell apart and were scavenged for their wood and metal (if they had any). Cargo wagons only appear in the Roman Era/ Iron Age, and really develop in the late Middle Ages. They tended to be pulled by oxen until the horse collar became common. Even then, if a heavy load had to go somewhere, oxen it was. An ox wagon was sort of the moving van of the day. Not fast, but it would haul a LOT on relatively little fuel compared to horses. A ship was ideal, but not everywhere had good rivers and cooperative winds.

Wagons had developed into many specialized styles by 1900. Some had ladders on the side. Those made the sides higher, and could be used to get the load into a large pile at the destination (hay and straw, or picking produce from trees). Freight wagons were different from farm wagons, in town compared to long distance, wagons for various trades with tool boxes and spare parts storage built in, wagons just for barrels (brewery wagon), wagons and carts with pumps and tanks (fire wagon), and so on. And that’s just Europe. The United States had the Conestoga, a modified freight wagon built at first in Conestoga, NY, with waterproofing and sides that sloped out from the bed to allow for more cargo and river crossing. “Prairie Schooner” was the other name for them. Chuck wagons were rolling kitchens.

So … what sort of vehicle do you need? How many birds will you hitch to it? What kind of loads are you carrying and how far? Will you have specialty loads, like liquids or mill wheels? Will you cross many rivers and streams? What is your budget? Is it for work or for show? Answer those questions and the protagonist can tell you better how much it will cost and when it will be ready, unless Radmar turns His wheel.

Plip, Plop, Gooosh!

“The rain it falls upon the just/ and on the unjust fella.

But mostly on the just because/ the unjust steals the just’s umbrella!”

Well, my part of Texas and New Mexico and Oklahoma got over a month’s worth of rain in two days, thanks to a southwesterly fetch over Baja and up into the area. Fortunately, the first day’s moisture came slowly, in batches, so things had time to drain. The next day? Training led to the usual places in towns and counties going under water. As usual.

If you look back at the records, this sort of “Equinoctial storm” was common prior to the 1950s, during the tail end of the Little Ice Age. There were fall flood peaks on most creeks in most years, caused by hurricanes that wobbled their way up to the area, or tropical fetches like this one. Combine warm, water-rich air with the usual cold fronts sliding down the Front Range of the Rockies from Canada or the northern Pacific, and rain falls and warm air gets nosed up and the water falls out. The ranchers love it, because it refills the rainwater lakes (playas) and lets the warm-season grass get one good burst of growth before the frosts. Farmers are OK with it because they have not yet planted the winter wheat, and anyone who grew corn has harvested it already. Cotton farmers … depends on what stage the plants are at. Either way, it “puts a good season into the ground.”

It’s been a while since this weather pattern visited the area, and people are murmuring about global weather changes, and, “Found a roof leak, but I’m not complaining.” I don’t think anyone dares to complain, because everyone else will whap them with whatever small object is at hand. We’re dry, and the rain is a boon. Then we might get a few dry days before another fetch pours water down on the area again.

Ideally, the rain would be spaced out, half an inch or so per day for two weeks. That’s not realistic – this isn’t Seattle or Portland, OR. It’s here, it’s falling, the lakes are filling, and the grass is growing. Street flooding for a few hours is a small price to pay for good, soaking rain.

Friday Fragment: The End of the Year

The low king returns from the place of sacrifice, and Tuathal’s question is, perhaps, answered.

Come the morning, Fiachta returned alone in his truchai, as he had the year before. Again blood marked his face and clothes, the blood of three pigs, a cow, and a fine ewe, lives given in thanks, along with finest bread and honey. The wise ones had declared that the gods desired only what they had given, not the life of a man or woman. Even so, the king’s people watched in fearful silence until he stepped down from the light, two-wheeled battle chariot. “The gods accept our gifts. Four days and the time for slaughter will come,” he called, voice as harsh as Tuathal’s own had been on his return from the hidden lands. 

That evening, Aelfyn played songs of harvest. Fresh mushrooms of four kinds, served with sweetened barley bread and the last of the old peas, filled the men’s stomachs. It was proper fare for the end of the year and the start of the new. Tiernan, the king’s steward, had built the fire high, easing the chill that had seeped into the great hall. The arms men and others moved slowly and spoke quietly, for all that they had not labored that day. The work of harvest left all weary, the servants and bondsmen and women most of all. Tuathal felt again the weight of exhaustion he had carried as he labored for the King under the Mound. He needed to test the tune he’d been given, but not now. The time would come. 

He sought his bed earlier than usual. If any suspected why, they did not make a sign. He was not alone. Meren came in after he stripped. “Rest this night, not pleasure, will you have from me,” he warned. 

She joined him. “Rest is a pleasure, generous master bard,” she whispered as she eased under the blankets. Indeed, she fell asleep almost the moment she lay down. The women of the court worked as hard as men, harder before feasts, or so it seemed. And with slaughter starting soon? All the more reason to sleep. 

Forchal and the woman wise met him two days later, as he drew close to their gateway. “Away from ears,” the gray-cloaked priest commanded. Tuathal inclined in a part-bow and walked beside them. Warmth had returned, although the sharp edge of the clouds to the north warned that it would not stay for long. More geese and other birds hurried down the skies, down from the north to the warmer lands. How far did they travel? To the edge of the world? A few feathered ones sang from the trees, songsters that stayed, or perhaps rested on their journey. The dry leaves hissed and whispered as they moved, falling in drifts of brown, red, and gold. The dark of pines stood out here and there among bare branches. Wood replaced grain in the wagons that groaned toward the hall. 

“Your question,” Forchal said at last. He stopped and turned so they stood face to face. The priestess moved to stand at his right shoulder, beside her senior. Forchal had aged as well over the year, but wore his authority lightly. Perhaps Eoghan’s death had released the strain among the wise ones, the way removing a bow string allowed the bow to rest.

Tuathal held out empty hands. “Has the penalty for breaking my gesh lifted entire, or is there more to be done, if it can be done?” None of the songs spoke of such, save the tale of Gwydion and his fellow magic worker undoing his nephew’s transformation and unjust injury.

“We do not know.” The woman’s voice carried no feeling or sense. “The signs do not speak to us of this, neither the birds nor the leaves nor the waters.” She frowned for the space of the beat of his heart, then her face unclouded. 

Forchal leaned forward and studied his hands, as if reading the dapple of light playing on them from between the leaves of the oak tree beside them. He straightened. “Your gesh came about why?”

Tuathal had to smile. “The tale is strange in the telling. I borrowed a hand drum and beater from the bard in my mother’s sister’s court. Not long after, she was elevated to high queen among the Brytheen. During that time, the beater failed from a crack in the wood. I carved one of blackthorn and polished it, then returned beater and drum at the proper time.

“The bard played the drum, then cast the gesh on me for not returning the broken beater with the drum and the new.” He shrugged. “I did not ask why his wrath was so great, only fled before he hurled more than just angry words and his shoe at my head.” 

Neither of the priests spoke, but shared confused looks. Forchal shrugged as well and held the hand not on his staff palm up. “Blackthorn is as oak for such, is it not?”

“It is, and perhaps harder, but I heard no difference in the sound when I played the drum, nor did my master.” 

Four leaves dropped from the oak, all landing with thunks rather than rustles. The priests exchanged another look, and the air chilled, grew hard, or so it felt. The green-clad woman intoned, “Seek out the ones in blue, brown, and gray, the ones solid in years. From them comes an answer.” Her voice flowed as water over stone, not as a mortal woman.

He swallowed hard and bowed. “My thanks for the words, oh wise one. I will do as you say.” 

“Good.” Forchal turned to attention his companion, a gesture of dismissal. 

Tuathal bowed again and hurried back by a different path, not slowing his steps until he stood under open sky and sun. Who where the ones in blue, brown, and gray? Merchants? Bards on the road? The priests did not wear brown, and rarely blue among the Dunalai people. He glanced to the north. The sharp edge of the clouds had come closer, cutting the sky into hard blue and dark gray. The wind wandered, now south, now east, summoned by the coming storm. 

He still had no answers that night, as the wind sang ancient battle songs and cries around Fiachta’s hall. Revelry and feasting filled the hall, along with the scents of roasting meat and good beer. Tuathal savored the smoked sausage and mushrooms. Far better that the arms men take the hero’s portion of the boiled and roasted meats. Sausage with the last of summer’s mushrooms carried a warmer flavor, rich with herbs and tales of distant lands, of cattle raids and legendary boars with golden bristles and ever-growing flesh. 

“What say you, múinti Allav?” Rian, one of the arms men, demanded. 

He raised his cup to the king and queen in their seats of honor. “I say that the kings of the east look at their treasures with unhappiness when they hear of the treasures in men held by Fiachta NoDomnail. The women of the Isle of Apples weep from envy when they hear tell of the skills and beauty of Aisling the Bold, queen of the Dunalaid of Dunad, and of her ladies. The warriors of the Finna hesitate before speaking ill of the bench men of the king of Dunad.” 

Broad smiles and cheers rose from the warriors, and the low king smiled wider still. “Great indeed is the king whose praises are sung by such a one as Tuathal the Open Handed,” Aisling called, her voice filling the hall. 

“As bard, as king; Fiachta who rivals Rhydderch in his generosity and prowess as king and warrior, wise as Cieran the Learned in Law,” Tuathal replied. 

The cheers grew louder still as Aisling nodded acknowledgment of his praise. 

“Open the hands of the king truly wise,

“Wise the warrior who takes the gift,

“Gifted the hands overflowing with skill,

“Skilled the ones who serve such a king,” he sang, then raised his now-full cup to the pair.

Oh, his head ached the next morning, pounding a dance tune out of keeping with his inability to walk. Mead and stout cider had followed the beer. He was no arms man to drink the casks dry, then rise and fight come the dawn! Tuathal relieved his urgency, then returned to bed. One of his fellow students had suggested that songs about cider mornings should be sung in a whisper, without harp or drum. He found no reason to disagree! Fiachta had inherited the full share of their father’s ability to drink, a full share and more. 

(C) 2026 Alma T. C. Boykin All Rights Reserved

This is the last excerpt from Bard’s Kings that will be posted.

Autumn at Last

The kites departed two weeks ago. Cricket song has replaced the cicadas for another year, until the first real freeze. The local buzzard colony has departed south, to the great relief of the people in whose trees they roost. The equinox has passed, and warnings about driving east into sunrise and west into sunset have been posted (hard to see pedestrians and others when the sun is in the opposite lane).

I had not realized how well I had acclimated to the 100s and upper 90s F until Tuesday. I went out in late afternoon to deposit the garbage in the community bin, wash the litter box, and water some plants. The air felt cool, not crisp but certainly comfortable in a long-sleeve summer shirt. It was … 80F. After temperatures of 95-104F, 80 came as a delightfully cool afternoon. The light had a different cast to it as well, perhaps clearer despite the humidity. The morning clouds had moved in layers, the bottom a veil of thin ripples under clumps of whipped-cream cumulus that caught the light of the rising sun to emerge from purple-gray skies.

The roses and other surviving plants are catching their second wind, and some are blooming once more. The butterflies are trying to rip the Greg’s Mist Flower out of the ground. The neighbors had to tear out their mist flower in order to have part of the house repainted (white on brick), and so our flowers are the main source of food. I also saw a bumblebee for the first time in forever, or so it seems. It was ignoring the queens, monarchs, fritilaries, and others dancing among purple, red, and yellow blooms. One of the honeysuckle vines is also blooming again, food for hummingbirds as they pass through.

We’ve not had many migratory birds yet. The drought had probably pushed them east and west, to moister lands. The lack of big cold fronts is also slowing their arrival, I suspect. If we indeed have broken the pattern of hot, dry weather under domes of high pressure, the next few weeks should come with the calls of geese, ducks, and perhaps Sandhill cranes.

The corn maze and pumpkin farm has opened. The amusement park and pools have closed. Football season is well underway, the Tri-State Fair has four days still to run, and rain is visiting the region. Orion looks down from mid-sky when I get up in the morning. Autumn is edging in, late and very welcome, or so it feels.