Look carefully at the picture below:
Charlemagne, A. Dürer, Germanisches Nationalmuseum, Nürnberg
Keep that image in mind.
Back in June, my folks and I stopped at an Autohof on one of the Autobahns. These are combination restaurants, convenience stores, coffee-shops, sometimes gas stations, news-stands, play-grounds, and always, places to use the restrooms. Continue reading
Athena T. Cat, nipped out.
The season for fresh catnip has arrived. Athena, being a feline of mature years, no longer goes wild with fresh catnip in a clean sock. She just breathes deeply of the fumes and gets spacey. Continue reading
I have final exams to inflict, er, ahem, administer today and tomorrow.
The shepherd is yelling “No mercy, my children!” Gnade (grace) also has some theological meanings as well, which can make the cartoon really funny if you think about how John the Baptist is usually depicted in medieval art. Or the Good Shepherd.
Yes, I have a really odd sense of humor. Continue reading
That was due last week?
Ah, yes the end of the year has arrived. The students are alternating between wild rejoicing and deepest panic. The teachers are not panicking.
OK, not much. The Dean is getting a little touchy about our having all grades in on time, though. Continue reading
Fr. Pax: Where is Brother Vector?
Mrs. Omnisapientia [secretary]: Out walking the dog, Father.
Fr. Pax [blinking]: Is that a new urban euphemism?
Mrs. Omnia: No, Father. His brother and sister took their parents to the art festival, and Br. Vector is taking care of the dog while everyone is out-of-town.
Fr. Pax: Ah. Clarity returns. Thank you.
******** Continue reading
There’s a wonderful German term, Treppenwitze, which means the great retort, comment, or joke that you came up with… as you left the party and went down the stairs (die Treppe). I’m a master of that art. But every so often, my wits work on time.
I was standing in line at a fancy buffet dinner, one of those where they carve slices off a roast beast as you watch. The carver had finished with one slab-o-meat and was waiting for another to arrive, and so his carving board was bare.
Alma: Oh! [smiles with excitement, points to empty carving board] Is that the roasted unicorn loin?
Carver: [split second of hesitation, roar of laughter] Yes, Ma’am, it most certainly is.
I’m certain that exchange had nothing to do with the thick slice of roast with extra juice that appeared on my plate a few moments later.
The water cooler hates me. The big copier and I have a friendly neutrality at the moment, but the water cooler hates me.
The first time I tried to change an empty water bottle, it attacked me. Continue reading