Dressing my Age: A Sartorial Rant

How do you do that anymore, especially in summer? OK, I tend to dress “Victorian Age” or “Escapee from the 1980s,” but I look at the way people dress, and I wonder what ever happened to aging with dignity when outside the home.

I know, I’m not one to talk. My closet is Odd in Odd ways, including a distinct fondness for sensible shoes. Yes, I have worn walking shoes with long skirts. Yes, maneuverability over fashion. I’ve reached the age and mindset where I don’t really care all that much about certain things, including keeping up with trends, other than knowing what to look out for on Casual Day at Day Job.

Unfortunately, we have gone back to “dress children like adults,” in the worst way. And a lot of adults dress like they are still in their 20s, in ways that are neither flattering nor appropriate, in my opinion. I get it, loose clothes or stretchy clothing are comfortable. And the world is a more casual place than it was 10, 20 year ago. [Saves related rant for later]. If you are doing construction work and break for lunch, or are a young mother with a small herd all trying to go in random directions as you run an errand, you’re not going to dress up. My hat is off to you, and I so get that. But those folks still look like adults.

I’m thinking of the matrons who dress like 16 year olds. Male styles tend to be somewhat more graduated in that teens look like kickers or “gantsta” wanna-bes, then they move to more expensive versions of the same, then sweats or shorts and a tee shirt (or untucked overshirt and tank top), and eventually tee-shirt and jeans/shorts/sweats. But a 40-something trying to look like a teenaged male in baggy shorts, tank-top and cover shirt with fancy sneakers? Um … At least we’ve been spared some of the really outré male styles. Leggings for guys never caught on out here, aside from hard-core runners and cyclists. (Once someone suggested imagining a local county sheriff in leggings. Two people laughed and the rest of us shuddered in horror.)

I wonder if, comfort and ease aside, part of it is a shift from thinking outward to thinking inward. I was brought up to consider how other people would react to me, and to show respect for others. That included respecting myself enough to generally be tidy, neatly dressed as appropriate for the task at hand, and polite. It took a little more effort, but that’s part of being an adult. Over time, it becomes ingrained. Today, the predominate culture seems inward focused, more about the individual’s desires. To be yourself means dressing as you want, behaving as you want, and that’s just how it is. “Society” needs to conform to the individual’s right to be casual, to a sort of aggressive egalitarianism. I’m probably misreading a lot, since I’ve given up on trying to follow all the current trends in style, manners, on-line vs. in-person behavior, and so on. I function in a different mental world than do normal people.

We joke about “I may grow older but I refuse to grow up,” and “I adulted today!” People have complained about adults who don’t act like adults going back to … probably just before pairs of animals started marching toward a large boat, or Og insisted on playing with a stick and hoop instead of grinding ocher for wall paint. Since legal adulthood keeps being pushed later and later, it seems as if sartorial and mental adulthood suffers the same fate. Being an adult is something to be delayed and avoided, rather than embraced as a privilege. Clothing and mannerisms make that visible.