. . . 2/3 of the deacons and the assistant minister are gone because someone’s fence went down and the cows got out.
. . . several deacons and over half the soprano section “carry.”
. . . the opening weekend of deer season is 1)Ladies Auxiliary Sunday and 2) acapella because the senior minister, associate, choir director, and organist have joined over half the choir and a large swath of the congregation out hunting.
. . . the choir newsletter includes rehearsal and performance news and schedules, prayer requests, and photos from game cameras.
. . . the gents at the coffee pot are discussing whether Peter and James would have done better as fishermen had they used trolling motors instead of sails.
. . . the Ladies Auxiliary makes all the money for the Emergency Relief Fund from their food booth at the county fair.
. . . when a new building and parking lot are added on, the new lot is striped for pickups (wider than standard spaces.)
. . . there are rumors that way back when, a meeting of the elders lasted until midnight because someone asked, “Was Jesus the only good shepherd?” and it took that long to settle the question.
. . . the preacher has an auxiliary fuel tank in his pickup because of home visits. (“Ten miles up the county blacktop, then eight miles up Country Road AA to the first cattle guard on the left. You’ll need to drop into four once you get onto the place. Go three miles, turn left at the Y . . .”)
. . . the choir director and one of the ministers are in a ferocious, brotherly, war with the senior deacon over who really got the biggest wild turkey in 2014. And they know that the vice president of the senior ladies sewing circle got a bird that beat all three of theirs, but “that’s different.”
Edited to add: Howdy and welcome to all y’all from Peter Grant’s blog! Thanks for stopping by and I hope you enjoy what you find. 🙂