Overheard in the Halls, Part Four

Mrs. Heiden: The world religion classes will be in the gym tomorrow. We’re doing tai chi.

Sr. Scholastica (aka The Dean): Thus the dress code change request. Understood. [makes notes] Will you be leading it?

Mrs. Heiden: No, Mrs. Chi from the college continuing ed program will. But I know how. [takes a tai chi pose] If anyone ever tries to mug me in slow motion, I’m ready.


Sr. Perpetua (calculus teacher): With the exception of Thursday, which is mass day, the entire high school will be absent in three weeks.

Fr. Pax (Headmaster): Good heavens! [looks at schedule board] That is most infortuitous timing.

Miss Red: I take it this is absent physically as well as mentally?

[Sound of laughter from all in boardroom]

Sr. Perpetua: [not smiling] Yes.


Sr. Scholastica: So, who are you today?

Miss Red: [checking desk calendar] Me, Miss Scales, and Mr. Long-Slavic-Last-Name. I’m you on Friday.

Sr. Scholastica: [checking pocket calendar] Hmmm. I thought you were Fr. Romanus on Friday. Very well.


Frantic Student: [charging pell mell out the front door as rain begins to pound down] Oh nooooooo!!!!!

Miss Red: [turning to group of slower moving scholars] Is there a problem or was that an escape attempt?

Snickering Student: Problem, Ma’am. He drove his dad’s car today.

Miss Red: And he neglected to inform his father?

Snickering Student: Yes, ma’am. And he left the top down!

Voice from Back of Group: Car karma strikes again.


Mrs. Floribunda (biology teacher): [talking to the box that the UPS driver has just handed her] You’d better not be dead this time, or I’ll kill you.



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