A Report from Occupy Toilet Mat

Or “What my evenings would be like if Athena T. Cat spoke English.”

A.T. Cat’s interest in the little rug around the base of the commode has not faded as I had hoped it would. She now camps out there every evening, after first blocking the path between the bedroom to the office (via the bathroom) in hopes of drive-by petting. Then she marches into the den and assaults my lap, usually about the time I finish what ever I am drinking and need a refill. Cat timing – gotta love it.

Around 2100 local time, she disappears. She has returned to her place of protest, the toilet mat, from whence She Shall Not Be Moved. The conversation goes something like this:

Athena T.C.: Mrow.

Alma: You’re in the way.

ATC: Mroup.

Alma: You’re still in the way.

ATC: [rolls partly onto back and tries to look cute]

Alma: You need to move. [brushes teeth and fends of cat who suddenly wants to drink out of the sink]

ATC: Mrah! [jumps down and returns to Toilet Mat]

Alma: [sighs, gets ready for bed, returns in hopes the cat has moved] You have to move.

ATC: Why? I’m comfortable.

Alma: Because I am going to step on you.

ATC: That’s your problem, not mine. It is your fault for wanting to be here. I was here first.

Alma: I am moving you.

ATC: This is my mat! You can’t move me. We shall not be, we shall not be SQUEAK! [cat is picked up and shifted fourteen inches]

Alma: I told you.

ATC: Oh yeah? [marches back and flops down on human’s toes] We shall over—cooome. We shall over—coooome . . .

Alma: I liked it better when you just got into the sink.

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5 thoughts on “A Report from Occupy Toilet Mat

  1. Have you tried putting a second mat down a foot or so away?

    Our problem is similar. We have one that like to sit and/or lay on the toilet. She jumps up on the lid and will flop down to watch you do what-ever it is that humans do, and then protests when you move her to use the bloody john.

    • The toilet is tucked into a corner, and she likes being enclosed on three sides. I suppose I could move her sandbox from its special cubby and put a little rug there, but the cure might be worse than the disease, in terms of midnight collisions and messes.

  2. You could just grab the rug she is laying on, and pull cat, mat, and all out of the way.

    Wyldkat; I recommend you act like a man and leave the toilet seat up. 🙂 This will cure the cat of laying on it, or at least she will move to the top of the tank, which would provide a backwarmer on those chilly nights.

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